GUIDE

My job has me on the road Monday through Thursday, and my 3-year-old's weekdays go on without me. How do I stay part of them?

By the seenow! teamLast updated:

You can't be there for the weekdays, but you can be in them. Keep short, frequent contact instead of one long call, set the next call at the end of each one, and leave things at home your child can use while you're gone. On Friday, ask about the week before you plan the weekend.

WHY

Why this happens

A Monday-to-Thursday travel schedule leaves you with long weekends at home, but it takes out the part of the week where most of a young child's life happens: preschool drop-off, the bath, the same three books at bedtime, the new word she learned on Tuesday. By Friday she has moved on to something else, and you hear about it secondhand.

The parent at home picks up all of that. In the Bureau of Labor Statistics' American Time Use Survey for 2025, women in households with children under 6 spent 2.8 hours a day on primary childcare for household children, and men spent 1.7 hours. With one parent on the road four days a week, much of the weekday share falls on the other one, and the traveling parent's contact has to fit around their evening.

A 3-year-old also has a short window for phone talk. The usual pattern is a long evening call that falls apart after two minutes, and a parent who hangs up feeling worse. Planning for the way young kids actually talk works better than trying harder on the same call.

HOW TO

What you can do starting today

  1. Keep contact short and frequentNo app needed

    ZERO TO THREE suggests short, frequent contact with young children, because they tire quickly. Try a two-minute call at breakfast and another before bed rather than one long one. Sing the same song, ask about one thing, and say goodbye while it is still going well. If she is cranky or asleep, there will be a next time.

    Source: ZERO TO THREE: Staying Connected While Separated from Your Young Child (2020)

  2. Set the next call at the end of each callNo app needed

    Work dinners and flights move around, so a fixed nightly time often fails. Penn State's military family resource suggests agreeing on the next call at the end of each one. Tell your child, too: "I'll call when you have your bath tomorrow." Agree with your partner on times that do not work, like the middle of dinner.

    Source: Penn State Thrive Initiative: How Parents Can Keep in Touch with Their Children While Traveling (2017)

  3. Leave things at home that keep you in the routineNo app needed

    Trace your hand on paper and tape it to the fridge for high-fives. Record yourself reading her favorite bedtime books so she can hear you on the nights you can't call. Start a folder for the drawings she makes for you, with her words written on each one, and look through it together on Friday.

    Source: ZERO TO THREE: Staying Connected While Separated from Your Young Child (2020) / Penn State Thrive Initiative: How Parents Can Keep in Touch with Their Children While Traveling (2017)

  4. Make Friday the debrief before the weekendNo app needed

    Before planning a big weekend outing, spend the first hour home on her week: the folder, the new word, the playground she went to with the other parent. Ask your partner for one or two things to bring up. A weekend that starts from her week feels less like two separate lives.

WITH SEENOW!

Doing it with seenow!

seenow! is a family app where everyone in a private group takes a short video, about 2 seconds a day, and sees each other's clips. It fits the weekday gaps that calls can't cover.

  • The parent at home takes a 2-second clip with the seenow! camera at a moment of the day, like the walk to preschool or the new word at dinner. You get a notification and can watch between meetings.
  • Post your own 2-second clip from the road, like the hotel window or the airport. The day's clips from your family open once you post yours, which also gives your child a small look at where you are.
  • On the weekend, the weekly recap video, made automatically from everyone's clips, is an easy thing to watch together on Friday or Saturday morning.

What seenow! can’t do

  • seenow! does not make calls. For the bedtime song or a short chat, use a phone or video call.
  • It cannot tell you whether a travel-heavy job is right for your family. That decision is yours and your partner's.

POINT

Things to watch for in this situation

Check in with the parent at home

The parent at home does four days of drop-offs, dinners and bedtimes alone. On your calls, ask how they are doing, not only how your child is. Small things, like a night off on the weekend, help keep the arrangement fair.

Tell her when you leave and when you come back

Slipping out while she sleeps can make Monday mornings harder later. A short goodbye and a simple count, such as "four sleeps and I'm home," gives a 3-year-old something to hold on to.

FAQ

Frequently asked questions

Should I take a job with this much travel?

That depends on your family, your finances and your partner, and this page cannot answer it. If you do take it, the steps above can help you stay part of the weekdays.

My daughter walks away from the phone after a minute. What can I do?

Give her something to look at instead of questions to answer. Show her your hotel room on video, or let her show you a toy, and keep it to a minute or two.