GUIDE
My nieces and nephews are 3 to 11 and live far away, and quick phone calls don't hold their attention. What game can we keep going by mail or online between visits?
By the seenow! teamLast updated:
Pick a game that moves one turn at a time, so every postcard or message is a move, not a letter that needs an answer. Give each child a job that fits their age, keep a running score or story at both houses, and set an end date that lands on your next visit.
WHY
Why this happens
Aunts and uncles are a relationship that can fade without anyone meaning it to. In a Pew Research Center survey from June 2025, 21% of adults who have an aunt or uncle said they are extremely or very close to one, compared with 36% who said that about a grandparent. Distance is part of it. In Pew's 2021 survey, 55% of adults lived within an hour's drive of at least some extended family, 24% lived near only a few relatives and about one in five lived near none.
Phone calls are a weak tool with kids, and weaker still with a spread of ages. A 3-year-old wants to show you a toy, an 8-year-old answers in single words, and an 11-year-old has somewhere to be. What holds children's attention across a distance is something to do, with a reason to come back next week.
A game with turns gives you both. Each child only has to make one small move, and each move gives them something to look forward to from you. You aren't asking for letters back. You are waiting for their turn.
HOW TO
What you can do starting today
Choose a game that moves in turnsNo app needed
Good long-distance games have short turns and no time pressure. A few that work with mixed ages: a story where each person adds one sentence or one drawing; a fill-in-the-blank silly story where the kids send you words and you send back the finished tale; a mystery close-up photo they have to guess; a board game like checkers or chess with one move per message. Pick one and stick to it for a season before adding another.
Give each age its own jobNo app needed
The same game can have a different role for each child. In a story chain, the 3-year-old picks the animal and the color and a parent writes it down; the 7-year-old draws the scene; the 11-year-old writes the next sentence and decides the cliffhanger. In a word game, the youngest gives "a funny animal," the oldest gives "a verb ending in -ing." Nobody is left out and nobody is bored.
Keep the game board at both housesNo app needed
Set up the same thing in two places: a checkers board on a shelf at each house, a folder with the story so far, a chart taped to the fridge with everyone's guesses. When your move arrives, they make it on their board; when theirs comes back, you make it on yours. Seeing the game sitting there between turns keeps it alive in their minds, and yours.
Agree on a rhythm with the parentsNo app needed
Ask your sibling which day works for a turn: Sunday afternoon, or the ride home from practice. Most games die because the parent at the other end was never asked. A weekly turn they can fit in is better than a daily one that collapses by the third week. Postcards work for the youngest; for older kids, a text to the parent's phone with a photo of the move is faster.
End the season at your next visitNo app needed
Give the game an end date that matches your next trip. Read the whole story aloud together, play the last moves of the checkers game across the same table, reveal the final mystery object in person. A finish line gives the kids something to count down to and makes the visit feel like part of the game.
WITH SEENOW!
Doing it with seenow!
seenow! is a private family app where each person shares a short clip, about 2 seconds a day. It fits the mystery close-up game better than letters do.
- Make a group just for you and your sibling's family, separate from other family groups. Post a 2-second close-up of something in your house, and let the kids guess on their next call or turn.
- The day's clips from others are blurred until you post your own, so the kids can post a clip of their own close-up to see yours. That turns a daily habit into a small trade.
What seenow! can’t do
- seenow! doesn't hold game boards, scores or a written story. Keep those on paper at both houses.
- There are no comments, so guesses and answers happen on a call, in a text to the parents, or by mail.
Core features are free.
POINT
Things to watch for in this situation
Don't keep score between the kids
With a spread of ages, a points race between siblings tends to end with the youngest in tears. Keep score between "the kids" and "Aunt Sam," or skip the score entirely and just keep the story going.
A missed turn is not a message
Games stall during the holidays, sports seasons and busy school weeks. If a turn doesn't come back, send a friendly nudge to the parent or just make your next move anyway. Kids pick a game back up easily when it is still sitting on the shelf waiting for them.
FAQ
Frequently asked questions
How can I stay close to nieces and nephews who live far away?
Give them something to do with you rather than something to report to you. A turn-based game by mail or message, with a small job for each child and an ending at your next visit, keeps you part of their week without needing a long phone call.
What can I mail to a 3-year-old niece or nephew?
Postcards with a big picture, a sticker for their part of the game, or a page they can color and send back. A parent can write down their answer, so they can play before they can write.